What Patience Brings – A Letter of Longing

Often times when you are splayed out on the bathroom floor with a broken heart, all you can do is lay there and pray that when the wound heals, it does not lock the heart in and the love out.

Forward toward the light

Forward toward the light

The pre dawn hours have secrets to share…
I meander down the path,
Away from me and toward you.
Away from the darkness and weight of the full moon shining bright in the night sky,
Toward the cracking of the sun’s desire to awaken us to the fullness and promise of a new day.
She is begging me to follow her forward.
The longing in my heart has risen from its slumber.
It aches to feel the power of your warmth.

It yearns to feel your breath on my neck as you embrace and fold me into the strength of you.
I feel the synchronicity of our souls dancing as we breathe together.
It is a point in time where your breath and mine stop their separateness and merge as one.
That moment of release brings comfort, excitement, safety and a heightened awareness of our connection.
It is home.

Walking down the path in the darkness, there is fear and exhilaration.
You slide your tender hand in mine.

Hold onto me, I’ll hold on to you. Take my hand, we’ll hide in the corner.

There is a promise in the silence that tells me I am safe.
Lay down with me under the haloed light of the overpass and listen to the music above.
Look up at the stars with me and together, let us wonder what is on the dark side of the silvery moon.
Share with me your dreams and your desires.
Talk with me forever about everything and nothing and about our shared passions.
Love me while my eyes get heavy.
Let me soften the sadness of your heart;
The hidden pain screaming to rise up and be excised from your body, face and soul.
Pull me to you and let me place my palms over your tired eyes.
Leave me with the smell of you permanently imbedded in my skin.

It took awhile for you to find me, because I was hiding in the lime tree.

Meet me in our secret place, where the blue door beckons us to trespass and the wind blows through the black paned windows, carrying all of our worries off into the pastel colored sky.
Let’s kidnap each other and get lost on some grand adventure.
Somewhere where fear is left in the dust and we are able to move forward into the all that is.
Spend the day with me riding around on two wheels, soaking in all of the beauty of our surroundings and observing all of the magical environs waiting to be discovered.

In the morning when I wake and the sun is coming through,
Oh, you fill my lungs with sweetness, and you fill my head with you. Can I be close to you?

Breathe with me as we flow through our practice together.
Place your hand in mine while we lay in the stillness of savasana.
Teach me all of the brilliance stored away in your mind.

Come.. surprise me with some of my favorite things and I will surprise you with the kind of love and touch you have been longing for, but afraid to let in.
Where is the mounting list of all of the things we wanted to do?
Finger the strings into a melody and sing to me the songs in your heart.

You are the place I feel at home, when all my bones are tired and cold and all alone
You are the time that I seem to find that occupies most of my mind

Show me your tender, your lawless, your nurturing, your naughty, and your love.
Lift the veil from the iron wall surrounding you and reveal the vulnerability in your smile.
Drive away the brutality of all of this silence and loneliness.
Let me once again see all of you.
Gaze upon me again with sweetness.
Seat with me and be my friend.

“Meet me there, bundles of flowers, we wait through the hours of cold.
Winter shall howl at the walls, tearing down doors of time.
Shelter as we go.
And promise me this
You’ll wait for me only, scared of the lonely arms.
Surface, far below these words
And maybe, just maybe, I’ll come home.
Who am I to you darling?” ~ Ben Howard